Things I Do that Adults Probably Don't Do (Jaiden Edition)/Transcript


 * James: (from his Random Thoughts video) I'm sort of stealing this idea from Jaiden Animations.... Wait, no that's not right. I'm not stealing it... (slow motion) I ' m p l a g i a r i z i n g i t .
 * Jaiden: Two can play at that game, James!! Things I do that adults probably don't do... plagiarized Jaiden edition. Also by the way, I'm very proud of you James, congrats on trending...again. I mean if I were to choose one of your videos to end up being on the top of the YouTube trending list, I'd probably want to choose the one where you tell people to watch my videos at the very start anyway... Now go watch James' videos. I think I'm supposed to fall in the category of adult now and apparently, according to Psychology Today, some of the requirements to being an adult are: don't be a jerk. Okay, check. I think I have that one down. If there's a situation where I can either be a jerk or not be a jerk, I'll probably choose..... Not being a jerk, that one's not too hard. Check your ego? Check. It wasn't hard to begin with. Call people back..people don't call me.... So I think......check. As much as I might have some of the traits to be an adult in society's eyes, there still a lot of things I do that adults probably don't so I'm gonna steal James' idea and talk about them. James just told me he kinda hates that video because it's old..so go and watch it and tell him, "Yeah, it's pretty old." I do this weird thing I like to call The Perfect Bite™. Basically when I'm eating I can't just be a normal person, that's the gist of it. What I do is after I sit down with a meal, I'll analyze it before I actually start eating, I'll look for a potato chip that's the best size, a vegetable that has the right amount of seasoning, an area on a sandwich where the ingredients are at a perfect ratio with each other. I'll find where the best would be.....and not eat it. I'll start eating where the second best bite is.
 * Viewer: Second-best...wouldn't you-?
 * Jaiden: NO!! I already know what you're gonna say! When eating Perfect Bite™ style, you can't start off eating the most absolute perfect bite! That's how you ruin everything, you don't want to ruin everything! You start with the second best and work your way around the best so you can finish the meal with the perfect bite. BOOM!! It all comes full circle! Start off with the almost best bite, end it on the perfect one: a good summary of the entire meal! I don't want to end on an unsatisfying bite. That would just make me disappointed and sad. I don't know of anyone else who does this? I don't even know how I started doing it to be honest. I've always eaten food this way...and been a freak! I'll end up having a plate with little individual bites of burrito, stray pieces of fruit, a single french fry and when eating with other people it looks really weird because there's just tiny sporadic bites organized on my plate. Sometimes they ask about it and I have to go through the whole process of how to eat Perfect Bite™ style with them and explain all the rules and yadayadayada, the whole story, and they judge me, but you know what? Don't knock it till you try it, okay? The Perfect Bite™ is a powerfully underrated technique. You don't even know! I wonder if I can copyright it too.... Since I'm on my own I have the freedom to decorate my living space with pretty much whatever I want. I like interior decorating! It's fun to decide what can go where, and choosing color schemes and all that house stuff. But even though I enjoy good decor, I also....don't take it very seriously. I buy things that are goofy and kind of stupid because when I walk into the room and see them, they make me laugh because of how ridiculous they are. I got a gift card for a home supply store I had never been to before and after a while of not using it I decided, "Hmm, it's probably about time I use this.." I walked into the place with $25 and no expectations and came out with two things. A kitchen ornament with nothing but a funny-looking rooster on it and in bold letters the word...EAT!!!!!! I don't know why I liked it so much. Maybe just the fact it says "EAT!!!" with a possibly aggravated rooster on it. I don't know what expression is. I'm just making an educated guess. It's pretty absurd...and I like it. Putting it in the kitchen makes it seem like it's a rule and I mean, you shou- you gotta obey the rooster her. When you're in the kitchen you should probably EAT!!! If kitchens were to have one rule, that'd probably be it. And the second thing I bought was a big case of.....plastic mini dinosaurs! I saw them and was like, "Yep, these belong in my house." Here's pictures of them! One time my friend came over, walked into my office and went:
 * Friend: What's this?
 * Jaiden: A dinosaur....? And then he smacked the mini dinosaur off the desk and slammed down a bigger one he bought in place of it! That was a fun time. I also bought this stuffed toucan and he makes me very happy. I was in Target looking for a lamp and saw him down the aisle and I like, physically stopped. My instinctual reaction was just, "Oh my god! I didn't realize how much I needed this toucan right now. GET IN MY LIFE!!" So whenever I walk into my room and see him..I get happy. I don't think adults are supposed to buy plastic dinosaurs, slightly aggravated roosters or dopey looking toucans as interior decorations though... I started getting really stressed and anxious when a conversation with someone ends and no one has anything else to say because there's a possibility where there will be a few seconds of silence and staring at each other like:
 * Person: So the conversation has ended.... Yep, we're done here.
 * Jaiden: Until someone eventually goes:
 * Person: Well, I'll see you later, then. Haha.
 * Jaiden: I hate that. I hate that so much. I don't care that hate is a strong word. I have a strong hate for it. I think it's just one of the worst ways to end an interaction with someone. You could have had the most transcendent conversation in the history of ever.
 * Person: Hey, I'm so glad we found a solution to world hunger and discovered the chemical formula for the cure of cancer.
 * Jaiden: But if it ends with that three seconds of awkward staring, it's-it's pfft- it's ruined EVERYTHING!!!
 * Person: Yeah, it was a..lot of fun. Worked pretty hard on it. (coughs)
 * Jaiden: In attempt to avoid that situation, my solution is to try and catch the conversation's end at the perfect time so it's a flawless conclusion with no bumbling around like if it was a human conversation simulator game. I totally get an A++, super with stars and hearts, and the person's little avatar would go s-ss-s-ss-ss-SWEET!! That's what I would do if I was normal. But since I'm exceedingly bad at anything related to social competence what typically happens is I start leaving in the middle of them still talking? I mean, I don't mean to do it. I realize the conversation is ending and I try to over prepare by beginning to step away, so they can finish their statement and it's an easy transition to the conclusion but I'm really bad at gauging when the right time start retracting from the conversation is and I misjudge how much left they have to say so it ends up going something like:
 * Friend: It was the biggest, fattest squirrel, I've ever seen, it was crazy.
 * Jaiden: That's insane. Well I-
 * Friend: And then my little sister came into the room and saw it and started freaking out and she... Uh..yeah, she thought it was a mutated monster squirrel, and yeah.
 * Jaiden: HA! Oh, that's funny. Yeah, I wish I could have seen it.
 * Friend: Yeah. It was crazy.
 * Jaiden: Up-- yeah, so I'll talk to you later.
 * Friend: Yeah... (awkward laugh) Okay, bye!
 * Jaiden: Why does it seem like someone's either really good or really bad at social interaction? It's either:
 * Laughing emoji: Oh my god this is me slash relatable slash...
 * Jaiden: I dunno or:
 * Person: It's simple, just....don't be stupid.
 * Jaiden: I'm excited to be at the adult stage in life where all of a sudden socializing is easy. When does that part happen when becoming an adult? Whenever that wants to happen....that'd be great. In the meantime, I'll just have to endure not knowing how to end conversations. One time, I was trying to end a phone call with someone and I didn't know how to bring up, "Hey I have to go now," because they kept talking and I ended up being on the phone with them for an entire extra hour. That was not fun. (awkward silence until end-card)

End-card

 * Jaiden: Anyway, so I don't know if you could tell but this video I actually tried something different ever since I started making videos I've always done just everything myself, and I've been adamant to stick with that. I want a certain feeling from my videos. Sometimes, I feel like everyone's always trying to get to the top business or fame or whatever wise and I kind of just want to stay homemade well to a certain extent. I still want to make smart decisions for my future and career if I start employing people of becoming a business or working with big companies, I worry I'll lose that everyday average person just making videos and being normal feeling that I want to have but for the last year, it's been- it's been kind of rough. I don't have a set upload schedule but I do have a mental goal to post an animation every two weeks and when I set goals I have to hit them or else I'm extremely hard on myself. I'm always hard on myself. Sometimes I'm disappointed in myself when I don't exceed a goal I hit, like I'll hit it, but that won't be enough for me. It's stupid and I can never just be happy with myself, but anyway, I started realizing I wasn't doing anything else other than working just to have enough time to get a video done by my deadline. I wasn't hanging out with friends, my family, I wasn't doing anything else because I never had free time to spare and it kind of hit me like yeah, I'm posting videos, but I'm pretty sure I should also be living life. I'm in my prime enjoying life years. I don't want to accidentally spend them all just working and not enjoying anything so I stepped out of my comfort zone and asked a couple other animators if they'd help me with scenes in the video so I can chill out a bit. They're super nice, too. I like them a lot. I don't want the fact that other people are helping me animate parts of my videos to change your view on anything. I'm still wanting to stay as homemade and simple as I can but I also felt like doing everything myself in limited time, hurt the quality of videos, too. I'd have to cut corners in order to save time which sucked and I feel like now things can start increasing quality since I have more time to spend and you don't have to rush everything. Either way, I hope this was OK for you. Sorry, if you don't like it, but I hope you can see where I'm coming from here. Thanks for listening! This is a long end card, the animated friends that helped are in the description if you want to send them some nice words and wear your- sunscreen because summer isn't quite over yet and skin protection is important.